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Jason.

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Jason is the founder of Ignite Student Ministries, a dynamic ministry igniting youth, young adults and university students to passionately pursue Christ and transform society in high schools, work places and universities around the world.

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The Gift of Singleness

Jason VanaJason Vana

Today is Valentine’s Day, and if you happen to be with someone, it can be a pretty romantic day. Special dinners, roses, candy and gifts all show you how much you are loved. But if you happen to be single like me…well, it’s a whole different experience. Let’s just say there’s a reason so many people call it Singles Awareness Day.

You see, being single isn’t easy.

Not only are you constantly reminded of what you don’t have through movies, music, seeing friends with their significant others, even being in the church, seeing all the families and hearing how it’s God’s plan for you to find someone, but also, society loves to tell us that if we’re single, there’s something wrong with us. Maybe you just aren’t attractive. Maybe you aren’t good with the opposite sex. Maybe you’re not sociable enough, or too scared to approach someone, or maybe, as I’ve heard multiple times, maybe you just aren’t attracted to the opposite sex. I mean, if you’re Christian and thirty and still single…there’s definitely something not right with you.

Not to mention that God Himself says in Genesis 2 that “it is not good for man to be alone.” We were created for love. We were created for relationship, and when you’re not in one, it can leave you feeling unwanted, unloved, and wondering if you will ever find someone to share your life with.

Believe me, I’ve been there more times than I would care to admit. But as hard as it is to be in a season of singleness, there is something I’ve learned over the past few years…

A season of singleness is a gift from God.

It’s in a season of singleness that God begins to work in our lives – helping us to find our sense of love, acceptance and worth in Him, not in someone else. It’s in the difficulties of being by yourself that He brings you face to face with who you really are. It’s in those times that He shows us how loved we really are…and gives us the opportunity to truly like who we are. Because when we’re single, when we aren’t dating that guy or that girl, is when we are being more honest with who we are. We aren’t trying to impress that person, getting them to accept us. You can just be, well, you.

It’s also in our times of singleness that God will begin working on our character – developing us into the men and women He wants us to be. It’s in this time that He will bring to the surface all the hurts and pains and rejection and, yes, sin that we have encountered in life, in order to help us deal with it. Not to mention we have more time to do the things He has called us to do.

Yeah, there’s a lot God wants to do in us during a season of singleness.

That doesn’t make it easier, though. It doesn’t mean the frustrations and pain of being single go away. It doesn’t mean that it will be easier to see all your couple friends together, or walk down the aisle in the store with all the candy hearts, or have no one special to celebrate the seasons of life with. It doesn’t make going to that wedding by yourself, or being the only single person at the party any easier…

But it does give a sense of purpose to our singleness.

It’s not out of coincidence. It’s not that there is something wrong with you. It’s not that you are called to be single for the rest of your life.

Your season of singleness is a gift from God, allowing you to focus on Him and become the person He has called you to be.

So to all those in this same season of singleness as I am – may you know that you truly are loved this Valentine’s day. May you understand that there is a God-given purpose to your singleness. And may you find the courage to embrace your singleness…and allow God to do everything He wants to do in you during this season.

Jason is the founder of Ignite Student Ministries, a dynamic ministry igniting youth, young adults and university students to passionately pursue Christ and transform society in high schools, work places and universities around the world.